I need to hire a woman but it's not what you think…

My son has issues. His therapist says the best way to help him is a family holiday.

The problem is we're not a family anymore.

My ex, Olivia, is a prize bitch.

A socialite who's nothing but a thorn in my side.

Not only that but she has a new boyfriend too.

I can't think of anything worse than spending two weeks in the Hamptons playing third wheel.

I complain to my best friend Ben and he tells me I should hire a girlfriend.

I didn't even know that was a thing.

Turns out it is, but this isn't a one-day event.

It's going to be two weeks of hell.

After searching on the website, the moment I see April, I know that she's perfect for the job.

She's a picture of innocence with her sea-blue eyes and her blonde hair.

My fake girlfriend's got her hand's full not only with my ex and my son, but with my c***k too!