If you are looking for a cozy, happy Christmas tale... keep looking. Because this is NOT it. As the title suggests, THIS story is about me, Spark. I'm not your average holly, jolly elf. Those elves have pudding for brains. Never questioning anything... While I, on the other hand, questioned everything and went and found the nitty gritty, dark secrets of this place, and the prick you all call "Santa". So, if you want to hear me spill the tea, then sit down, shut the f*** up, and enjoy the ride.