Dysfunctional family dynamics can ruin a person's life, health, career, and self-esteem. Making positive life changes and rebuilding self-esteem can only be accomplished by clearly seeing the family's negative patterns, and learning how to move beyond them.
Stand Your Ground reveals how deeply dysfunctional family dynamics can affect us, offers advice on the best ways to deal with difficult relatives and family bullies, and teaches readers a simple four-step plan for recovering from the trauma of growing up in a dysfunctional family and rebuilding self-esteem.
Written by the award-winning author of The Box of Daughter and Bullied: Why You Feel Bad Inside and What to Do About It, Stand Your Ground will help readers learn the tools of emotional intelligence, let go of intense and painful emotions, and create a workable plan for dealing with family issues and reclaiming the authentic self.
Questions and exercises help readers discover the particular dynamics of their individual families, ferret out unspoken rules of behavior, and understand how family patterns instilled in childhood may negatively affect their self-image, their experience of life, their relationships, and their ability to accomplish what they want. Once the family patterns are clearly seen and understood, readers can follow the steps outlined in Stand Your Ground to rebuild self-esteem and create an authentic, productive, and happy life.
Autorentext
Katherine Mayfield is the award-winning author of "The Box of Daughter," a memoir describing her journey of recovery from family bullying and emotional abuse; a guide to recovery from bullying, "Bullied: Why You Feel Bad Inside and What to Do About It"; "Dysfunctional Families: The Truth Behind the Happy Family Facade"; a book of poetry, a book of essays, and other books on dysfunctional families. She has appeared as keynote speaker for regional conferences, and has presented at schools and libraries across the Northeast on recovery from bullying and emotional abuse. Ms. Mayfield appeared on NBC-TV's "207" to talk about her work, and has been a guest on radio shows across the country, discussing dysfunctional family issues, recovery from bullying, and prevention of teen suicide. She has written for national magazines, local newspapers, and numerous websites, and has received funding from the Maine Arts Commission for her work. Ms. Mayfield's memoir, "The Box of Daughter," won awards in the New England Book Festival and Reader's Favorite Awards, and was nominated as a finalist in the Maine Literary Awards. Along with her books, publication credits include Dance Teacher Now magazine, Dance Spirit magazine, The Significato Journal online, Sasee magazine, The Women's Times, the Greenfield Recorder, Salon.com, TinyBuddha.com, MeaningfulWomen.com, and WomensMemoirs.com. A former actress, she appeared Off-Broadway and on the daytime drama Guiding Light. She blogs on dysfunctional families on her website, www.TheBoxofDaughter.com.
Inhalt
Introduction Journaling If you need more help
Chapter 1: Digging Down to Find the Truth What is "Spider Love"? Controlling behavior and manipulation in families The false self Family secrets Learning to trust yourself
Chapter 2: Coping with Repetitive Criticism What to do when you're criticized The sense of futility: "There's nothing I can do" Beware the drama addiction!
Chapter 3: Tips for Coping with Family Bullying Don't take it personally Generalizing: "You always..." and "You never..." It's all about control Beware of emotional "dumping" Plan your responses ahead of time Remove yourself from the situation Set boundaries When you leave, leave it all behind you
Chapter 4: Recovering from a Dysfunctional Childhood Become a witness for your emotional self The four steps to recovery More ways to express feelings
Chapter 5: Understanding the "Rules" in Your Family Uncovering the family rules Unspoken rules Shaming How to change or disobey a family rule
Chapter 6: Reclaiming Your Authentic Self Trapped in the mirror Focus on what you enjoy Follow your intuition Support and encourage yourself And finally...
Appendix: Exercises About the Author