Alex Horne loves words. He loves them so much, in fact, that he's decided to invent his own ... and get them into the dictionary. But, as Alex discovers, gaining entry into the official lexicon takes more than just a gentle word in the ear of the editor. Evidence is required - Alex needs proof that his words are being spoken by more people than just him and his mum. He needs what the dictionary authorities call a 'corpus' of examples, hard data showing that his new words are in widespread and long-term usage. So a corpus he resolves to create, no matter what obstacles he might meet on the way. This is the epic and ridiculous story of one man's struggle to break into the dictionary.
From covert word-dropping on Countdown to wilfully misinforming schoolchildren, Alex tries it all in his quest for dictionary-based immortality. Does he succeed? Are you already using one of Alex's words without realising it? You won't regret spending your hard-earned honk on this hugely entertaining book.
Vorwort
Join the hilarious Alex Horne on his quest for dictionary-based immortality
Autorentext
Alex Horne
noun
1. comedian, writer, gambler, taskmaster, podcaster, birdwatcher, potential neologist and father.
Zusammenfassung
After a decade of climbing the career ladder collecting business cards, box files and an assortment of baffling acronyms, Charlotte Moerman leaps off into the great unknown of motherhood. She gamely enters into her new life and soon can't imagine a world before Pampers wipes. But without appraisals or targets to guide her along the way, Charlotte also realises there's an awful lot to learn. Scratching her head over egg-and-soldiers etiquette, the appeal of paper pants, and her instinctive new urge to rock shopping trolleys whether or not there's a passenger on board, Charlotte also surrenders any last hope of achieving household minimalism, what with submarines in the bath, marbles underfoot and a villainous nappy bin that would give Doctor Who a run for his money. Instructions Not Included follows the joy and the pain of becoming mum to three small boys, from juggling multiple demands and accepting going to the loo as a group activity, to finding 300 ways to describe being knackered. Charlotte's days in paid work soon seem distant. So, frequently, does her Dutch husband. Armed with a sharp wit, an encyclopaedic knowledge of children's literature and a nit comb, Charlotte allows women to celebrate their own uncertainty as she guides them through her experiences of the potential minefield that is motherhood.