Perhaps the greatest book of poetry ever written. Matthew James is a sheer genius and a cunning linguist. He paints words onto a page the way da Vinci did onto ceilings, or was that Michelangelo? Either way, he's impressive. The emotionality of this master work explodes from the pages and hits you straight in the face with a walloping force. This book will mesmerize and provocatize. Nothing is taboo to Matthew James. He regularly breaks boundaries with his insights on subjects like sex, liquor fuelled promiscuity, and women. Considered by the Incas to be a cross between William Shakespeare and Wilt Chamberlain, Matthew James is truly a genius of our time. Please, let him put his poems in you. They won't disappoint.

Matthew James was born and raised on Vancouver Island in the province of British Columbia. He claims to have sprung to fame playing Matthew Perry's butt double in a movie once, although he has no factual evidence to back it up. Matthew James regularly performs stand-up comedy at a number of classy establishments, and a few dive bars too. He is the author of a book of smut-poetry called Let Me Put My Poems In You, a self-help book titled Don't Be A Douchebag: A Man's Guide to Etiquette, and the political manifesto Matthew James for President: Look Out, America! Matthew currently resides near Vancouver, Canada, with his strikingly beautiful wife and two lively young sons.